The other day I was walking with a friend and she asked me if I was ready for my race this weekend, my response was “welllll” and she immediately said, “so I take it you’re not someone who is happy just to finish the race?”
No, I guess I am not.
I like to take a lax approach to races, because I have learned that putting pressure on myself gets me nowhere.
But I guess things have changed because I am feeling anxious/nervous for this race.
I haven’t run a half marathon since the Ridgefield Half in 2014 and that is making me crazy nervous, although it shouldn’t I still have been trucking along and logging miles.
I am going to this race alone. I usually have my dad by my side because he is running the race too. But he opted out of this one. I am a grown up and perfectly capable of going to places by myself but for some reason I like having someone at the race with me. But I guess I need to put my big girl pants on! Plus I have a few friends who will be there so I wont be completely alone.
I haven’t felt my fastest in ANY of my training runs, I haven’t trained past 8 miles which has worked for me in the past. Maybe I don’t love running as much as I used to? But I just don’t finish my training runs thinking man that felt good!
I have gotten significantly faster every half marathon and I have the same expectations for tomorrow, but I am worried I won’t reach that goal.
(this is tmi) I am worried I won’t make it through the race without having an emergency and trying to find the closest bathroom… oh the joys of having IBS. It has recently affected my running and if I don’t have the opportunity to go to the bathroom before the race I could screw myself during the race. This is currently my biggest fear.
Because ultimately I want to be able to finish the race, the only thing that would kill me the most would to not be able to finish that race. While the time matters to me finishing it matters even more.
AND that is how I feel about my race tomorrow, sorry for the word vomit but if I want to sleep tonight I needed to get all my thoughts/fears out there.
On another note, can you recommend any songs I should add to my playlist for tomorrow!?!
Here’s to seeing that finish line!
What are you doing this weekend?
Are you running any races?